I didn't have answer for that. I told him we would have to see when it happened. I began to get stressed again. Cal saw it and told me that maybe we shouldn't see each other. He told me he didn't want to be the cause of another relapse into drugs. I assured him that wouldn't happen.Two months after the beach trip, I had finally saved enough money to move out of my parent's house. I rented a little trailer at a trailer park and the weekend I moved in Cal called and asked if I wanted to go out with Kellie to a TG club. This was to be Kellie's first bar experience, and I agreed to go.When I got to the house, Kellie told me that a friend from the support group she was going to was going to meet us there. I was very excited about having my own place and wanted to stop by there first, but she was being incredibly frustrating, insisting we didn't have time before her friend got to the club. I was very angry, but I gave in. We could always go afterward. I was also stoned. I couldn't deal. After wasting much of the day, I felt a little frustrated, so I took mylaptop into the bedroom and locked the door. I clicked my favorite pornwebsite and scanned the Lesbian section."This is so gross. This is one of the few things I didn't miss aboutyou," Jill chided."I just need to get off," I told her."Have Chris do it. He's an expert," Jill recommended."Fuck off," I replied to her. "You tricked me into having sex with him,"I accused."Don't act like you didn't like it," she replied.I couldn't deny that it was the most intense sexual experience I hadever had. It was also the most traumatic. I had no control over how longit would last or what position I would be in. He was in total control ofthe situation. With my laptop, I was now in control.I played a Lesbian video and reached into my pants. I had gotten used tonot having a penis but this new anatomy was still strange to me. Itwasn't female anatomy as I had known it. The head of my penis was madeinto a clit. I found the little nub.
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